Archive for March, 2014

It’s funny. Ok maybe funny isn’t the word. It’s sad-funny.

For years and years I have held onto a wrong against my middle (now deceased) child perpetrated by someone who should have done nothing but build him up and better him. I have held onto a hatred that ate holes in my soul due to this.

Was this the perpetrator’s fault? No. That person can deal with the issue through their own conscience and their own God. However, while I believed in my mind that it wasn’t up to me to judge what others did, not wanting others to judge me, my hatred and my unforgiving nature was being very judgmental in this matter.

I have finally come to grips with it. I can be angry with the situation but I have no right to be judgmental and to let that hatred eat at me and everyone around me and the situation at hand. I just need to continue on but keep that individual in my prayers to find peace.

So. Even though said person doesn’t speak to me and doesn’t feel any wrongdoing was done to one of my babies, my forgiveness is offered up to not only that but also to myself for wallowing in it for so long.

Forgiveness sets me right with *my* God at least, even if forgetting isn’t possible. I still forgive. I am at peace with it. I have enough of my own personal issues to handle. I choose to move forward rather than wallow in it.

Forgiveness is the key.

“But I say to you, love your enemies and pray for those who persecute you so that you may also be sons and daughters of God who is in heaven.” Matthew 5:44,45


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