Archive for January, 2013


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I’ve been off work for a few days.  Roy has started a brand new job.  It’s always hard to go back to work after time off and/or to change jobs, particularly when both of us would be perfectly happy self-employed and able to completely support ourselves independently.  Unfortunately, that is not currently the case.  So after a few days off work (or for Roy after a few days into a new job), here is our very much UNHUMBLE opinion on what keeps us going.








It may not be “PC”, but I will repeat Roy’s and my oft-stated mantra.  When have we ever EVER claimed to be PC?




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of our own ilk

Variances in individual personalities make life, friendships, and social interaction much more interesting than having everyone of the same cut & color and wanting the same things. Obviously all of us desire to be around those of our same belief system and heading in the same general direction (or, as one of my mentors says, of the same ilk); however, if we all had the same exact beliefs, wants, needs, and desires, it would make for a very boring life.

This is probably why Roy and I like being around people of various backgrounds and with various personalities. We like to be challenged. We learn from them as much if not more than they might learn from us, helping us all grow in life and not become stagnant. Stagnation in life is to me almost worse than death because you are not even truly living. You are just existing in life and floating through it.


Neither one of us understands those that limit their friendships because they don’t want to venture out of their closed little comfort zone.

We like to be around all variety of people with a variety of goals in life. We like that they may like to live in various states or countries, drive various cars, apply themselves to various vocations, and exercise various life choices. We like to hear their opinions. We like to have meaningful discussions and find out about their backgrounds. We like to understand their reasons for various choices and beliefs. We like to know various people that might enjoy living in various places that we might visit. We have our own personal choices and preferences but we like a variety of types of people. We like that our network of friends might ask about our own comments and/or choices as it helps us grow and develop in life and not become closed to change.

So with all of that being said, we personally do not like hanging around people that have no concrete goals and desires in life. We do not like hanging around people with closed minds. We do not like hanging around limited thinkers. We do not like hanging around the people that want only the status quo and to not look at better ways to be and do in life. We don’t like hanging around those that belittle what we like to do, what we work for, and what our dreams are. We don’t like hanging around those who attack our friends and family. We don’t like hanging out with those who degrade other people as we know if they talk about others badly, then we’ll be their next target when not around. We particularly don’t like hanging around gossiping, whispering, backstabbing, clique-y people. Essentially we don’t like hanging around anyone who doesn’t respect who we are (or who our friends are), what we want & believe, and how we choose to live.

We look for the independent clear thinkers with true goals and dreams that look to better their life as well as the lives of those around them. Their goals don’t have to match ours specifically. We know however their passion, energy, and forward movement will move us forward in our own goals, dreams, and passions. We wish to be able to do the same for them. We look to those that try to uplift not only themselves but others around them. We look for those that will ask us questions that make us think, grow, and improve. We look for those that want the same from us without getting their feelings unnecessarily hurt over questions that are designed to make them think and examine themselves. We look for people that want to grow and improve right along with us. We want to be challenged and we want to challenge others to do the same. We want to be with those that want to work as hard as we do and don’t want to be coddled with handouts *or* with just platitudes instead of true conversational introspection.

We look for those of our own ilk.





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do nothing



Sometimes a day doing absolutely nothing is what we all need.


I’m right on target.


This is my “life lesson” of the day.


clean house






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People with a REAL job would be FIRED for not doing their jobs.

TRUE business people would go BANKRUPT and OUT OF BUSINESS doing this.

Perhaps that’s what the Senate is TRYING to do … make the USA go “out of business”.

They’re already fast on the course toward bankruptcy.







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If he doesn’t like the way this country is …







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One of the MAIN and most important things I’ve learned in life, as has Roy, would be the following:

With all the flat-out BS we have both encountered in life, if we weren’t able to get past it, move on, and carry on in life, we’d never have found good and we’d carry around poison in our souls that would only be emanating out to those around us.  Essentially, it boils down to this:


However, the only way we’ll find something better is to look past it, let the bad go, and carry on.

We’ve always tried to find out how to fix that shit that happens.  We find out what may have gone wrong or what perhaps we did to cause something so that we can correct it and/or make amends.  We don’t hide from it.  We don’t ignore the situation.  If someone else is involved in it, we discuss it with them.  We go full force at it and then, once it’s done, WE LET IT GO.

That’s how we have been able to move forward and find the good in life and find something better for ourselves.  We’ve learned to grow up … put on our big girl or big boy pants … and move forward.

Maybe that’s part of our problem with being as independent as we are.  We can’t worry all the time about what everyone else is doing or thinking about us.  Chances are … they AREN’T … because they’re too busy worrying about what someone else thinks of them.  We don’t have that luxury.  Some days our worry is putting one foot in front of the other and making sure we’re able to do that.  When my 2nd son died, I was lucky to get out of bed in the morning.  Some days that was my whole goal … to just get up out of bed so that I could make sure my other 2 children were ok. When Roy and I went through all of our medical and financial and employment issues a few short years ago, our main goal was making sure we were there for each other and going at the problems and the issues.  When someone essentially backstabbed us during it all, we went straight at them and the issue and FIXED IT.  There are many many more that I won’t list here now.  Suffice it to say that we have had so many things happen that we can either sit in a corner and feel sorry for ourselves and try to nurse our wounds and say “oh poor me” and “woe is me” and “everyone is picking on me”, but what good would that do?


We’re also not going to pick on and judge others for how they are.

However, if there is a “perceived issue” between us and someone else, we’ll try to find out what the challenge is.

Our opinion is this:

Get to the bottom of the problem.  Don’t lie about it.  Don’t hide from it.  Fix it if possible.  Move on if it’s not possible.  Learn from whatever happened.  Make the changes to not let it happen again.



I guess that’s our problem though.  We don’t like to have unresolved issues.  We go straight at a problem if we think there is one.  I guess not everyone is that way.  Many people still resolve it like they did in middle school and high school.

“Hi, Mary, it’s Billy.  Susie told me that Johnny said that Sally thinks you were mean to her so none of them like you any more.”

This is pure 7th grade … through and through … which is a theme I spoke of in a prior blogpost.

Ok … so … why doesn’t SALLY tell whoever she thinks was mean to her what they did so it can be resolved?  That’s what it boils down to.  When someone is 12 years old, they aren’t always mature enough to be able to handle it well.  However, we would think that it would be something a person acquires over time (or at least tries to acquire over time) … and most definitely by the time adulthood is reached.

If Sally is unhappy … rather than telling Johnny she’s mad … and having it then go through Susie to Billy to Mary … particularly if they are all in their 40s, 50s, 60s, and/or beyond … perhaps Sally should go talk to Mary about the problem and GET IT SOLVED.  If it CAN’T be solved, then they’ll at least know WHY and what is going on, rather than guessing all the time.  If it can’t be solved, they can at least carry on with their lives and not continue to talk behind each other’s backs.  They can then find a better way for each of them.

I see this over and over and over and OVER … and not just from 12 year olds … but from older and older people who can’t seem to let go of their past and get out of the clique mentality of 7th grade … or high school.  I see it at work.  I see it in social circles.  I see it between neighbors.  I see it in political liaisons.  I see it in families.

Guess what?  When an individual learns to LET IT GO, then they can *TRULY* be considered “adult”, at least in my not-so-humble opinion.  That’s also when they can truly find a better life for themselves.  They’ll find that a better life comes along for all of them.  Maybe that “better life” will be together between them.  Maybe it won’t be.  However, carrying around that negativity will ensure that they will never find that “something better”.


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… and this comment comes from a “news” person?

I didn’t realize that it was BO’s “job” to “destroy” another political party or the beliefs of many of the people of this country.

This shows an utter and complete lack of class and lack of professionalism on John Dickerson’s part.  It also illustrates to me that he is not a “news reporter” … he is a political editorialist.

I used to think that a “news director”, while on the job, wasn’t supposed to interject his particular political bias.

When did that change for the worse?

The lamestream media and the alphabet networks are completely in BO’s pocket with their heads up his ass.

The funny thing is that, from the impression I get of BO, he’ll use them for his gain but he’ll turn on them in a heartbeat.

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“From the day we arrive on the planet and blinking step into the sun, there’s more to be seen than can ever be seen, more to do than can ever be done … Some of us fall by the wayside and some of us soar to the stars and some of us sail through our troubles and some have to live with the scars. There’s far too much to take in here, more to find than can ever be found, but the sun rollin’ high through the sapphire sky keeps the great and small on the endless round. In the circle of life is the wheel of fortune …” Elton John

In my blogpost of 12.21.12 named “Job Searches”, I mentioned some of our massive challenges in the past many years. We are of the ilk (and were both raised this way) to go in swinging when hit with a set-back. Neither of us are quitters. We’re both the type that will, as my father used to tell me, “if you’re knocked down in life, well, get back up NO MATTER WHAT and come back fighting harder and more determined”.

We’re still coming out of the major issues in life that would crush most people (death of parents, death of children, paternity suits, divorces, health issues, lawsuits, unscrupulous contractors and realtors, financial upheaval, job upheaval, health and emotional issues with family members, learning disabled children, relocation … just to name a few). We’ve continued on in the face of it all and we will continue to.

We laugh in the face of challenge.

You cannot break our spirit.

We’ll never fall by the wayside.

We’ll live with our scars.

We’ll work through our troubles.

We’ll soar to the stars.

We fight on.

We have each others’ backs against all marauders ALWAYS.


“Did you think this fool could never win? Well look at me! I’m a’comin’ back again … Don’t you know I’m still standing, better than I ever did, lookin’ like a true survivor, feelin’ like a little kid. I’m still standing after all this time … I’m still standing. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah! I’m still standing. Yeah! Yeah! Yeah!” Elton John

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